Men generally and African men in particular, have zero tolerance for cheating wives and will go to any length to punish their women once their suspicion is confirmed with the slightest proof. A Zambian man found two used condoms in his wife’s handbag and decided to reward her for her unfaithfulness by rubbing hot chilli (pepper) on her underwear.
Telling the story of her unpleasant experience in her marriage in a fully-packed court, Nellie Simambo, 30, of Matero Township in Lusaka could not hold back her tears as she recounted how the incident resulted in the swelling of her private parts.
According to her, her husband, Smart Simambo, was always suspecting her of having extramarital affairs which made him smear pepper on her underwear. She also said that her husband was a violent man who beat her all the time for no obvious reason.
Nellie who sued her husband for divorce explained that her husband recently attempted to kill her while she was asleep, leaving her with a swollen neck. In addition, she said her spouse also slept with a knife in his pocket and always threatened to kill her.
“I am tired of this man and I am afraid if I continue staying with him he will kill me because he moves with a knife in his pocket,” she told the court.
Defending himself, Smart Simambo told the court that his wife was involved in an extra-marital affair which was the root cause the dispute in their marriage.
When he found two used condoms in his wife’s handbag, Mr. Smart said, he confronted her to explain how the condoms got into her bag. He accused her of being disrespectful, insulting him in the presence of their children and sexually denying him.
“My wife has also denied me sex for the past five months and yet she has the audacity to come home with used condoms in her bag.”
In her ruling, Magistrate Pauline Newa granted the couple divorce and issued an order for Smart to compensate Nellie with K8,000. Custody of the children was granted to Nellie while Smart was ordered to provide K500 per month as child support.
While men in our part of the globe are ‘permitted’ to cheat on their wives and get away with it, these same cheating men would expect their wives to remain loyal and never as much as admire any other man. However, a Nigerian lady, Nkechi Bianze, in a Facebook post made it clear that no particular gender has a monopoly of cheating. Just like the saying goes ‘what a man can do, a woman can do better’.
“Guys need to understand that women are polygamous in nature, most especially Nigerian women. It is in the nature of women to cheat.
“A recent survey reported that 62% of Nigerian women are unfaithful. That’s to tell you that it’s in the nature of women, most especially Nigerian women to cheat.
“Cheating or not is at the discretion of the wife!
“If as a man you nd a woman who doesn’t cheat on you, then you are just lucky. But stop giving yourself unnecessary heartache checking her phones and keeping a prying eye on her.
“If your wife cheats on you, it doesn’t mean that she doesn’t love you. A woman can love and respect you but still cheat on you. It just means that she wants to explore. As long as she still respects you by at least being discreet with her sexcapades, and still plays her roles as a wife, I see no reason why you should get worked up over it.
“I mean, it’s not like the vagina is going to disappear or change in colour and shape.
“It is stupidity to divorce your wife just because she cheats on you. How many do you want to marry? The next woman might even be worse. And remember that according to the Bible, if you decide to divorce your wife for any reason at all, you are expected to remain celibate for life, or till she dies.
“I hope God gives our men the wisdom to understand that cheating is NOT enough reason to divorce their wives, or even complain at all.”