200+ Best Sex Quotes Ever

Sex is one of the subjects most people shy away from yet it is one of the most vital aspects of the human life. Our culture has taken the subject of sex so seriously and made it a restricted topic. Questions regarding sex contribute most of the major questions in the minds of many. A lot of people find it humorous while many see it as a serious subject; whichever group you belong to, sex as a topic of discussion can be entertaining as well as educating. This article is all about listing some of the best sex quotes ever, and we hope they will get your interest.

Sexy Quotes

1. I feel sexy in my jeans and wearing my boyfriend’s T-shirt. – Jennifer Aniston

2. There’s something sexy about a gut. Not a 400-pound beer gut, but a little paunch. I love that. – Sandra Bullock

3. When you’re a girl, you have to be everything, You have to be dope at what you do, but you have to be super sweet, and you have to be sexy, and you have to be this and you have to be that and you have to be nice, and you have to – it’s like, I can’t be all of those things at once. I’m a human being. – Nicki Minaj

4. I could see myself in a relationship with a girl; Olivia Wilde is so sexy she makes me want to strangle a mountain ox with my bare hands. She’s mesmerising. – Megan Fox

5. A good photographer can make you look incredible, even when you’re not feeling very sexy. – Cindy Margolis

6. My wife met me at the door the other night in a sexy negligee. Unfortunately, she was just coming home. – Rodney Dangerfield

7. I’m not trying to be sexy. It’s just my way of expressing myself when I move around. – Elvis Presley

8. From the moment I was six, I felt sexy. And let me tell you it was hell, sheer hell, waiting to do something about it. – Bette Davis

9. I love a man with a great sense of humour and who is intelligent – a man who has a great smile. He has to make me laugh. I like a man who is very ambitious and driven and who has a good heart and makes me feel safe. I like a man who is very strong and independent and confident – that is very sexy – but at the same time, he’s very kind to people. – Nicole Scherzinger

10. There is an element of seduction in shoes that doesn’t exist for men. A woman can be sexy, charming, witty or shy with her shoes. – Christian Louboutin

11. Anyone who thinks they’re sexy needs their head checked. – Jarvis Cocker

12. Kathy Bates is sexy. It’s partly because of her talent, but she’s got a great face and a great laugh. – Denis Leary

13. I know that people think I’m sexy and I am looked at as that. It is cool with me. It’s wonderful to have sex appeal. If you embrace it, it can be a very beautiful thing. – Aaliyah

14. I just really want it at some point to be OK for women and young girls to be sexy because I think that’s a power, a gift that we were given by God or the universe or whatever. – Megan Fox

15. Just because I look sexy on the cover of Rolling Stone doesn’t mean I’m naughty. – Britney Spears

16. I’m really quite happy to say that in my early 40’s, I wake up feeling sexy, and I can’t say I felt that way in my late 20s. – Tori Amos – 17. I’m not a ‘sexy’ ‘beautiful’ woman. It takes a lot of work to make me look like a girl. – Megan Fox

18. I’m not a type of feminist who is afraid to be sexy. – Megan Fox

19. A woman can be sexy, charming, witty or shy with her shoes. – Christian Louboutin

20. Honesty is very sexy. – Valerie Bertinelli

21. I see myself as sexy. If you are comfortable with it, it can be very classy and appealing. – Aaliyah

22. Few things in life seem sexier than a banned book. – Chuck Palahniuk

23. I think they all went too far. Their jeans got too low, their tops got too see-through. Personally, I think that sexy is keeping yourself mysterious. I’m really an old-fashioned girl, and I think I’m totally sexy. – Stevie Nicks

24. Figure skating is an unlikely Olympic event but its good television. It’s sort of combination of gymnastics and ballet. A little sexy too which doesn’t hurt. – Andy Rooney

25. I had nothing growing up, but I always wanted to be ‘sexy,’ even before I knew what the word was. – Dolly Parton

26. I like someone who is a little crazy but coming from a good place. I think scars are sexy because it means you made a mistake that led to a mess. – Angelina Jolie

27. I think people are sexy when they have a sense of humor when they are smart when they have some sense of style, when they are kind when they express their own opinions, when they are creative, when they have character. – Suzanne Vega

28. Dad needs to show an incredible amount of respect and humor and friendship toward his mate so the kids understand their parents are sexy, they’re fun, they do things together, they’re best friends. Kids learn by example. If I respect Mom, they’re going to respect Mom. – Tim Allen

Best Sex Quotes Ever

29.All women do have a different sense of sexuality, or sense of fun, or sense of like what’s sexy or cool or tough. – Angelina Jolie

30. Vampires are sexy to a woman perhaps because the fantasy is similar to that of the man on the white horse sweeping her off to paradise. – Frank Langella

31. Let’s make math fun and sexy and glamorous. Smart is sexy, that’s one of my main messages. – Danica McKellar

32. I’m such an avid magazine reader – music, art, beauty magazines – and I found that food and restaurants were pouring into everything I cared about. Whether it was the pop-up concept or some mysterious mini-mall restaurant, I got swept up in the sexy romance of the food movement. – Drew Barrymore

33. Do I consider myself sexy? It all depends on the way I’m feeling. When I’m happy inside, that’s when I feel most sexy. – Anna Kournikova

34. I have fun being sexy and tough at the same time. – Christina Aguilera

35. I don’t want people to think of me as sexy. – Taylor Swift

36. There is a real vulgarity in the way women dress at the moment. They show off too much and try too hard. They don’t understand where the line is between sexy and vulgar. I know where that line is. – Roberto Cavalli

37. Being strong can be also feminine. I don’t think feminine equals being weak. Being strong is very sexy. – Sanaa Lathan

38. Why should 20-year-olds only be considered sexy? I think we get better with age. – Jenny McCarthy

39. I think trying too hard to be sexy is the worst thing in the world a woman can do. – Christian Bale

40. Black women have always been these vixens, these animalistic erotic women. Why can’t we just be the sexy American girl next door? – Tyra Banks

41. Over the holidays, and even during filming, I realized that I actually like my body, even if it’s not perfect according to the book. I just feel sexy. For the first time, I don’t want to get rid of the curves. I just want to tone it up. My body is comfortable, and it’s not unhealthy, so I’m going to rock with it. – Rihanna

42. I’m really exciting. I smile a lot, I win a lot, and I’m really sexy. – Serena Williams

43. I used to be super trendy and totally sexy. But I look back now and I used to want everything short and low cut and you really can’t do it all. – Kim Kardashian

44. You don’t have to be naked to be sexy. – Nicole Kidman

45. No matter what a woman looks like, if she’s confident, she’s sexy. – Paris Hilton

46. I am not a sexy woman, I’m not beautiful, I’m not a sex kitten, I don’t flirt with people, yet I’ve been tagged more of a sex symbol than women who truly are and I that’s because I don’t reveal too much: people are curious. – Shirley Manson

47. Nobody thinks of themselves as sexy, really. Some days you go, ‘Hey, I’m not going too bad today.’ But if you try and be sexy, you’ll never be sexy. – Jennifer Aniston

48.  Women’s fashion is a subtle form of bondage. It’s men’s way of binding them. We put them in these tight, high-heeled shoes, we make them wear these tight clothes and we say they look sexy. But they’re actually tied up. – David Duchovny

49. I think there’s something incredibly sexy about a woman wearing her boyfriend’s T-shirt and underwear. – Calvin Klein

50. One of the best things for a woman to hear is that she is sexy. – Scarlett Johansson

Funny Sexual Quotes

51. A girl’s legs are her best friends, but the best of friends must part. ~ Redd Foxx

52. Personally, I know nothing about sex because I’ve always been married. ~ Zsa Zsa Gabor

53. Sex is like bridge: If you don’t have a good partner, you better have a good hand. ~ Charles Pierce

54. Sex is nature, and I believe in going along with nature. ~ Marilyn Monroe

55. The closest I ever came to a menage-a-trois was when I dated a schizophrenic. ~ Rita Rudner

56. Sex is like art. Most of it is pretty bad, and the good stuff is out of your price range. ~ Scott Roeben

57. What’s the most popular pastime in America? Autoeroticism, hands down. ~ Scott Roeben

58. Women need a reason to have sex. Men just need a place. ~ Billy Crystal

59. I admit I have a tremendous sex drive. My boyfriend lives forty miles away. ~ Phyllis Diller

60. As a lover, I’m about as impressive as a magician on the radio. ~ Scott Roeben

61. I think I mentioned to Bob [Geldof] I could make love for eight hours. What I didn’t say was that this included four hours of begging and then dinner and a movie. ~ Sting

62. Humans are the only animal who can have sex over the phone. ~ Dave Letterman


63. I practice safe sex – I use an airbag. ~ Garry Shandling

64. I’m a terrible lover. I’ve actually given a woman an anti-climax. ~ Scott Roeben

65. It’s hard for me to get used to these changing times. I can remember when the air was clean and sex was dirty. ~ George Burns

66. Sex without love is an empty experience, but as empty experiences go it’s a pretty good one. ~ Woody Allen

67. Men who tell you they read the Ann Summers catalogue for the articles are lying. ~ Rita Rudner

68. My girlfriend always laughs during sex – no matter what she’s reading. ~ Steve Jobs

69. What’re the three words you never want to hear while making love? Honey, I’m home. ~ Ken Hammond

70. The majority of husbands remind me of an orangutan trying to play the violin. ~ Honore de Balzac

71. Continental people have sex lives; the English have hot-water bottles. ~ George Mikes

72. I’ll come and make love to you at five o’clock. If I’m late, start without me. ~ Tallulah Bankhead

73. The conversation like television set on honeymoon…unnecessary. ~ Peter Sellers

74. He had ambitions, at one time, to become a sex maniac, but he failed his practical. ~ Les Dawson

75. Reading computer manuals without the hardware is as frustrating as reading sex manuals without the software. ~ Arthur C. Clarke

76. Sex… the pleasure is momentary, the position ridiculous, and the expense damnable. ~ Lord Chesterfield

77. Sex is a bad thing because it rumples the clothes. ~ Jacqueline Kennedy Onassis

78. Really, sex and laughter do go very well together, and I wondered – and I still do – which is more important. ~ Hermione Gingold

79. I started out to be a sex fiend, but I couldn’t pass the physical. ~ Robert Mitchum

80. A fast word about oral contraception. I asked a girl to go to bed with me, she said ‘no’. ~ Woody Allen

81. I wish I had as much in bed as I get in the newspapers. ~ Linda Ronstadt

82. If someone had told me years ago that sharing a sense of humour was so vital to partnerships, I could have avoided a lot of sex. ~ Kate Beckinsale

83. When I came here, I couldn’t speak a word of English, but my sex life was perfect. Now my English is perfect but my sex life is rubbish. ~ Julio Iglesias


84. An intellectual is a person who’s found one thing that’s more interesting than sex. ~ Aldous Huxley

85. My love life is terrible. The last time I was inside a woman was when I visited the Statue of Liberty. ~ Woody Allen

86. I’m glad I’m not bisexual. I couldn’t stand being rejected by men as well as women. ~ Bernard Manning

87. What’s wrong with a little incest? It’s both handy and cheap. ~ James Agate

88. I blame my mother for my poor sex life. All she told me was, “the man goes on top and the woman underneath”. For three years my husband and I slept on bunk beds. ~ Joan Rivers

89. Love is the answer – but while you’re waiting for the answer sex raises some pretty good questions. ~ Woody Allen

90. My wife is a sex object – every time I ask for sex, she objects. ~ Les Dawson

91. If sex is such a natural phenomenon, how come there are so many books on how to? ~ Bette Midler

92. Leaving sex to the feminists is like letting your dog vacation at the taxidermist. ~ Camille Paglia

93. Your marriage is in trouble if your wife says, ‘You’re only interested in one thing,’ and you can’t remember what it is. ~ Milton Berle

94. It’s not true that I had nothing on. I had the radio on. ~ Marylyn Munroe

95. Sex: the thing that takes up the least amount of time and causes the most amount of trouble. ~ John Barrymore

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96. It isn’t premarital sex if you have no intention of getting married. ~ Drew Carey

97. The big difference between sex for money and sex for free is that sex for money costs less. ~ Brendan Francis

98. Sex is more fun than cars but cars refuel quicker than men. ~ Germaine Greer

99. There we were in the middle of a sexual revolution wearing clothes that guaranteed we wouldn’t get laid. ~ Denis Leary

100. Sex appeal is 50% what you’ve got and 50% what people think you’ve got. ~ Sophia Loren

Sex Quotes For Him – Sex Quotes For Her

101. I know nothing about sex, because I was always married. – Zsa Zsa Gabor

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102. Desire is in men a hunger, in women only an appetite. – Mignon McLaughlin

103. The hypothalamus is one of the most important parts of the brain, involved in many kinds of motivation, among other functions. The hypothalamus controls the “Four F’s”: fighting, fleeing, feeding, and mating. – Unknown

104. Sex at age ninety is like trying to shoot pool with a rope. – George Burns

105. It is not sex that gives the pleasure, but the lover.-  Marge Piercy

106. Love ain’t nothing but sex misspelled.-  Harlan Ellison

107. Being with a woman all night never hurt no professional baseball player. It’s staying up all night looking for a woman that does him in. – Casey Stengel

108. Sex: the pleasure is momentary, the position ridiculous, and the expense damnable. – Lord Chesterfield

109. Virginity can be lost by a thought. – St. Jerome

110. A chicken and an egg are lying in bed. The chicken is smoking a cigarette with a satisfied smile on its face and the egg is frowning and looking put out. The egg mutters to no one in particular, “I guess we answered that question.” – Unknown

111. Love is a matter of chemistry, but sex is a matter of physics. – Unknown

112. Sex got me into trouble from the age of fifteen: I’m hoping that by the time I’m seventy I’ll straighten it out. – Harold Robbins

113. Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. – Mignon McLaughlin


114. Chastity: The most unnatural of the sexual perversions. – Aldous Huxley

115. Sex between a man and a woman can be absolutely wonderful; provided you get between the right man and the right woman. – Woody Allen

116. Literature is mostly about having sex and not much about having children; life is the other way around. – David Lodge

117. Masturbation: the primary sexual activity of mankind. In the nineteenth century it was a disease; in the twentieth, it’s a cure. – Thomas Szasz

118.We have reason to believe that man first walked upright to free his hands for masturbation. – Lily Tomlin

119. An intellectual is a person who’s found one thing that’s more interesting than sex. – Aldous Huxley

120. Men reach their sexual peak at eighteen. Women reach theirs at thirty-five. Do you get the feeling that God is playing a practical joke? – Rita Rudner

121. Pornography is supposed to arouse sexual desires. If pornography is a crime, when will they arrest makers of perfume?- Richard Fleischer

122. Sex is the great amateur art. The professional, male or female, is frowned on: he or she misses the point, and spoils the show. – David Cort

123. Don’t worry, it only seems kinky the first time. – Unknown

124. The reproduction of mankind is a great marvel and mystery. Had God consulted me in the matter, I should have advised him to continue the generation of the species by fashioning them out of clay. – Martin Luther

125. When a man goes on a date he wonders if he is going to get lucky. A woman already knows. – Frederike Ryder

126. My father told me all about the birds and the bees, the liar – I went steady with a woodpecker till I was twenty one. – Bob Hope

127. Do infants enjoy infancy as much as adults enjoy adultery? – Murray Banks


128. Anticipation makes the hard-on longer. – Itsby Stevintary

129.I thank God I was raised Catholic, so sex will always be dirty. – John Waters

130. Sex without love is an empty experience, but as empty experiences go it’s one of the best. – Woody Allen

131. The big difference between sex for money and sex for free is that sex for money usually costs less. – Brendan Francis

132. The art of procreation and the members employed therein are so repulsive, that if it were not for the beauty of the faces and the adornments of the actors and the pent-up impulse, nature would lose the human species. – Leonardo da Vinci

133. Sudden acquaintance brings repentance. – Thomas Fuller

134. The best contraceptive is a glass of cold water: not before or after, but instead. – Unknown

135. Instruction in sex is as important as instruction in food; yet not only are our adolescents not taught the physiology of sex, but never warned that the strongest sexual attraction may exist between persons so incompatible in tastes and capacities that they could not endure living together for a week much less a lifetime. – George Bernard Shaw

136. Flies spread disease – keep yours zipped. – Unknown

137. Having sex is like playing bridge. If you don’t have a good partner, you’d better have a good hand. – Woody Allen

138. Isn’t it interesting how the sounds are the same for an awful nightmare and great sex? – From the television show The Golden Girls

139. Vanity, revenge, loneliness, boredom, all apply: lust is one of the least of the reasons for promiscuity. – Mignon McLaughlin

Dirty Sex Quotes

140. When a guy goes to a hooker, he’s not paying her for sex, he’s paying her to leave. ~ Author Unknown

141. A dirty book is rarely dusty. ~ Author Unknown

142. When a man talks dirty to a woman, it’s sexual harassment. When a woman talks dirty to a man, it’s $3.95 a minute. ~ Author Unknown

143. Life in Lubbock, Texas, taught me two things: One is that God loves you and you’re going to burn in hell. The other is that sex is the most awful, filthy thing on earth and you should save it for someone you love. ~ Butch Hancock

144. To hear many religious people talk, one would think God created the torso, head, legs and arms, but the devil slapped on the genitals. ~ Don Schrader

145. The best sex education for kids is when Daddy pats Mommy on the fanny when he comes home from work. ~ William H. Masters

146. There are three possible parts to a date, of which at least two must be offered: entertainment, food, and affection. It is customary to begin a series of dates with a great deal of entertainment, a moderate amount of food, and the merest suggestion of affection. As the amount of affection increases, the entertainment can be reduced proportionately. When the affection is the entertainment, we no longer call it dating. Under no circumstances can the food be omitted. ~ Miss Manners’ Guide to Excruciatingly Correct Behaviour

147. Kids in back seats cause accidents, accidents in back seats cause kids. ~ Author Unknown

148. Don’t worry, it only seems kinky the first time. ~ Author Unknown

149. Men are those creatures with two legs and eight hands. ~ Jayne Mansfield

150. I’m all for bringing back the birch, but only between c5nsenting adults. ~ Gore Vidal


151. Older women are best because they always think they may be doing it for the last time. ~ Ian Fleming

152. I think men talk to women so they can sleep with them and women sleep with men so they can talk to them. ~ Jay McInerney

153. I’d like to meet the man who invented sex and see what he’s working on now. ~Author Unknown

154. A widespread taste for pornography means that nature is alerting us to some threat of extinction. ~ J.G. Ballard, “News from the Sun,” Myths of the Near Future, 1982

155. You know, of course, that the Tasmanians, who never committed adultery, are now extinct. ~ W. Somerset Maugham, The Bread-Winner

156. Sex: the thing that takes up the least amount of time and causes the most amount of trouble. ~ John Barrymore

157. It is not economical to go to bed early to save candles if the result is twins. ~ Chinese Proverb

158. Chastity: The most unnatural of the sexual perversions. ~ Aldous Huxley, Eyeless in Gaza, 1936

159. Obscenity is whatever gives the Judge an erection. ~ Author Unknown

160. Sex is not the answer. Sex is the question. “Yes” is the answer. ~ Swami X

161. Men get laid, but women get screwed. ~ Quentin Crisp

162. No matter how much cats fight, there always seem to be plenty of kittens. ~ Abraham Lincoln

163. My reaction to porn films is as follows: After the first ten minutes, I want to go home and screw. After the first 20 minutes, I never want to screw again as long as I live. ~ Erica Jong, Playboy Magazine, September 1975

164. Familiarity breeds contempt — and children. ~ Mark Twain

165. The good thing about masturbation is that you don’t have to get dressed up for it. ~ Truman Capote

Sex Partner Quotes


166. Sex relieves tension — love causes it. ~ Woody Allen

167. If you use the electric vibrator near water, you will come and go at the same time. ~ Louise Sammons

168. Men w ake up aroused in the morning. We can’t help it. We just wake up and we want you. And the women are thinking, “How can he want me the way I look in the morning?” It’s because we can’t see you. We have no blood anywhere near our optic nerve. ~ Sean Morey

169. I think I could fall madly in bed with you. ~ Author Unknown

170. The tragedy of sexual intercourse is the perpetual virginity of the soul. ~William B. Yeats

171. Sex on television can’t hurt you unless you fall off. ~ Author Unknown

172. Flies spread disease — keep yours zipped. ~Author Unknown

173. Remember, if you smoke after sex you’re doing it too fast. ~ Woody Allen

174. Don’t knock masturbation — it’s sex with someone I love. ~ Woody Allen

175. Sex is the best high. It’s better than any drug. I want to die making love because it feels so good.

176. I admit, I have a tremendous sex drive. My boyfriend lives forty miles away.

177. Sex is better than talk…Talk is what you suffer through so you can get to sex.

178. Sex is more fun than cars but cars refuel quicker than men.

179. Women need a reason to have sex, men just need a place.

180. Sex is like bridge: If you don’t have a good partner, you better have a good hand.

181. When a person has sex, they’re not just having it with that partner, they’re having it with everybody that partner has had it with for the past ten years.

182. It takes half the amount of time you dated someone to get over them.

183. He had ambitions, at one time, to become a sex maniac, but he failed his practical.

184. Sex is the most beautiful thing that can take place between a happily married man and his secretary.

185. Forget health clinics and gyms. Sex is the best cure. One good night of sex and your problems are gone.

186. Sex is nature, and I believe in going along with nature.

187. You know that look women get when they want sex? Me neither!

Good Sex Quotes

188. “God created sex. Priests created marriage.” – Voltaire

189. “A man marries to have a home, but also because he doesn’t want to be bothered with sex and all that sort of thing.” – W. Somerset Maugham

190. “Extra-marital sex is as overrated as pre-marital sex. And marital sex, come to think of it.” – Simon Gray

191. “An orgasm a day keeps the doctor away.” – Mae West

192. “Among men, sex sometimes results in intimacy; among women, intimacy sometimes results in sex.” – Barbara Cartland

193. “We may eventually come to realize that chastity is no more a virtue than malnutrition.” – Alex Comfort

194. “Kissing don’t last; cookery do.” – George Meredith


195. “The world has suffered more from the ravages of ill-advised marriages than from virginity.” – Ambrose Bierce

196. “There is one thing I would break up over and that is if she caught me with another woman. I wouldn’t stand for that.” – Steve Martin.

197. “There’s nothing better than good sex. But bad sex? A peanut butter and jelly sandwich are better than bad sex.” – Billy Joel

198. “A kiss is a lovely trick designed by nature to stop speech when words become superfluous.” – Ingrid Bergman

199. “What a happy and holy fashion it is that those who love one another should rest on the same pillow.” – Nathaniel Hawthorne

200. “I love being married. It’s so great to find that one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life.” – Rita Rudner

201. “Always get married early in the morning. That way, if it doesn’t work out, you haven’t wasted a whole day.” – Mickey Rooney

202. “We have reason to believe that man first walked upright to free his hands for masturbation.” – Lily Tomlin

203. “If God had intended us not to masturbate, He would have made our arms shorter.” – George Carlin

204. “An orgasm is just a reflex, like a sneeze.” – Ruth Westheimer

205.  “The appropriate age for marriage is around 18 for girls and 37 for men.” – Aristotle

206. “I know nothing about sex, because I was always married.” – Zsa Zsa Gabor

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