South African Universities Set To Introduce B.Sc In Witchcraft


Wonders shall never cease! News making rounds has it that the South African Minister of Higher Education and Training, Blade Nzimande has announced plans to have witchcraft included in the curriculum from 2018, giving students who wish to get an education on witchcraft the chance to do so in the country’s universities.

The minister made this known while addressing representatives from student unions around the country, adding that the introduction of the course is aimed at learning skills which are peculiar to people who practice witchcraft. Announcing the bizarre move, he urged future university entrees to consider taking Witchcraft as a course.

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Hear him:

“There is a lot we can learn from witchcraft, like how they fly in that winnowing basket. Imagine if we learn that skill. It will eradicate traffic jams and everyone will just get in their basket and fly. It also means we will not be importing fuel anymore.”

SA Witchcraft 1
South African Universities Set To Introduce In Witchcraft

Mr. Blade was said to have invited renowned witches to make an appointment with his office so they can have their skills tested and those outstanding would then be hired as lecturers. He further extended the invitation to witches from outside South Africa with a promise of giving them permanent residents permits.

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He said:

“I spoke to Gibs (Minister of Home affairs Malusi Gigaba) and he agreed to issue witches from outside South Africa with permanent residence permits. I heard Malawi and Zimbabwe have an impressive collection of witches. We are hoping they will heed the call.”

Sequel to the announcement, the student representatives who packed the auditorium were disappointed having gone there with the expectation that the Minister would announce a 0% fee increase for the coming year. Expressing their anger, they booed and threw bottles at him.

Submission of applications into the department by interested students is said to be closing at midnight on September 30 and there is presently a job opening for 109 witches.