There are more than enough signs with which people tends to judge your personality even when they don’t know much about you. As Dr. Travis Bradberry says, “human brain is hardwired to judge and survival mechanism makes it very hard to meet someone without evaluating and interpreting their behaviour.”
We are so good at judging other people’s personalities based on small things that, in a University of Kansas study, subjects accurately predicted people’s personality traits, such as extroversion/introversion, emotional stability, agreeableness, conscientiousness, and openness, simply by looking at pictures of the shoes they wore.
Bradberry explained that our unconscious behaviors have a language of their own, and their words aren’t always kind. These behaviors have likely become an integral part of who you are, and if you don’t spend much time thinking about them, now is a good time to start, because they could be sabotaging your career or the personality that you wish to exude.
9 Small Signs People Use To Judge Your Personality
1. How You Treat Waiters And Receptionists.
How you treat support staff is so indicative of your makeup that it has become a common interview tactic. Multiple users said they pay close attention to how other people interact with waiters.
Even top executives say that you can learn a lot about someone based on the way he or she treats waiters, hotel maids, and security guards. Ron Shaich, CEO of Panera Bread, says that he once declined to give someone a job partly because she was nice to him but rude to someone cleaning the tables nearby.
Business lunches are another place this comes to light. No matter how nice you are to the people you have lunch with, it’s all for naught if those people witness you behaving badly toward others.
2. How Often You Check Your Phone
There’s nothing more frustrating than someone pulling out their phone mid-conversation. Doing so conveys a lack of respect, attention, listening skills, and willpower. Unless it’s an emergency, it’s wise to keep your phone holstered.
A study from Elon University confirms that pulling out your phone during a conversation lowers both the quality and quantity of face-to-face interactions.
3. Repetitive, Nervous Habits
Touching your nails or face or picking at your skin typically indicates that you’re nervous, overwhelmed, and not in control. Research from the University of Michigan suggests that these nervous habits are indicative of a perfectionistic personality, and that perfectionists are more likely to engage in these habits when they’re frustrated or bored.
4. How Long You Take To Ask Questions
Have you ever had a conversation with someone where they talked about themselves the entire time? The amount of time someone allows to pass before they take an interest in you is a strong personality indicator.
People who only talk about themselves tend to be loud, self-absorbed “takers.” People who only ask questions and share little about themselves are usually quiet, humble “givers.” Those who strike a nice balance of give-and-take are reciprocators and good conversationalists.
5. Your Handshake
It’s common for people to associate a weak handshake with a lack of confidence and an overall lackadaisical attitude.
A study at the University of Alabama showed that, although it isn’t safe to draw assumptions about someone’s competence based on their handshake, you can accurately identify personality traits. Specifically, the study found that a firm handshake equates with being less shy, less neurotic, and more extroverted.
Showing up late leads people to think that you lack respect and tend to procrastinate, as well as being lazy or disinterested. Contrary to these perceptions, a San Diego State University study by Jeff Conte revealed that tardiness is typically seen in people who multitask, or are high in relaxed, Type B personality traits.
Conte’s study found that Type B individuals are often late because they experience time more slowly than the rest of us. Bottom line here is not to read too much into people showing up late. It’s better to ask what’s behind it than to make assumptions.
7. Your Handwriting
There are all manner of false stereotypes attempting to relate your handwriting to your personality. For example, people believe that how hard you press down on the paper relates to how uptight you are, the slant of your writing indicates introversion or extroversion, and the neatness/sloppiness of your writing reveals organizational tendencies.
The research is inconclusive at best when it comes to handwriting and personality. If you have an important letter to write, I’d suggest sticking to the keyboard to keep things neutral.
8. People Judge Your Eye Contact
The key to eye contact is balance. While it’s important to maintain eye contact, doing so 100% of the time is perceived as aggressive and creepy.
At the same time, if you only maintain eye contact for a small portion of the conversation, you’ll come across as disinterested, shy, or embarrassed. Studies show that maintaining eye contact for roughly 60% of a conversation strikes the right balance and makes you come across as interested, friendly, and trustworthy.
9. People Judge Your Taste In Music
Citing a 2003 study on the topic, Quora user Humaira Siddiqui says that she judges people based on the type of music they listen to.
The study found that people who listen to “reflective and complex” music tend to be open to new experiences and politically liberal. Those who listen to “upbeat and conventional” jams are more likely to be extroverted and athletic.
The little things in life truly does make a difference and like the saying goes, “you only get one chance to make a first impression.”